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If Kevin Smith directed the LotR movies
by Burma
"Say 'friend' and enter" replaced with "Say 'Snootchie Bootchies' and enter"
Brandybuck clan replaced with the Hicks clan
Arwen the 'dish'
Silent Merry and Pippin corner the 'pipe weed' market
Ben Affleck as Frodo and Jason Lee as Sam talk debate endlessly if innocent construction workers died needlessly in the destruction of the second Death Star
George Carlin as Gandalf
Chris Rock as Rufus - the previously unknown tenth Nazgul
Saruman shouts down from the tower of Orthanc "Anyone seen a ball down there." Gandalf shouts back "Just this pair of big ones ya' dingleberry!"
Soundtrack by Soul Asylum
Lafours the Witch King
Cameo by Stan Lee
Eowyn's depression actually the result of the time she accidently did it with this dead guy in the bathroom at Hornberg thinking it was Aragorn
